Success!

Baby has started sleeping earlier and easier too. Bedtime routine established, me think!

Well, I start to wipe her down at 9.30pm. This she so loves-complete with smiles and all! Then massage baby bedtime lotion all over her from head to tiny toes. A little menthol goes on her tummy, chest and back. Next, a change of clothes and diaper. By then, she's hungry for a feed and before long, she starts begging to be put to bed! She's out by 11pm and she wakes up once or twice throughout the night. No more 1.30-2.30am bedtime. Hooray!

I love your natural spiky mohawk hair, your unshappened brows, your outward curving forehead, your beauriful, big eyes, your button nose, the downy hair on your ears, your upside down U-shaped mouth, the birthmark on your back, the lines on your hands and legs, the baby muscles on your thighs and your cute little pair of feet.

Sssssshhhh.....I'm here, Sayang. Mama sayang baby. Mama's here. Mama's next to you.

I love you, baby!

???

It's been so long now that I now stare blankly at this 'new post' page. And my blog stares back at me like 2 strangers. The prob is; ideas come bounding on what to write in my blog at something like 3.30am (after baby has been put to sleep) but then I debate on whether I should log on and blog at that God awful time or if I should put it off till morning. As usual, the latter wins hands down. And as usual, the bright idea disappears by the next time I log into my blog account!

Oh I miss blogging. I miss the flow of ideas. I miss just letting be and letting go.

Why did I bother writing this? Well, in the hope that it will bring back memories on 'how to blog' ideas onto e-screen. In the hope that after this I will have more? Does it work? Hmmm...beats me. I think in order to have ideas flowing, we gotta have lots of time. Free time to waste and not have a baby napping by my side who is such a light sleeper and keeps stretching and making noises in her sleep!

Who the hell coined the phrase 'sleeping like a baby'? Did he/she ever watch a baby sleep? Babies don't ever sleep soundly! Heck, it should be 'Sleeping like a teenager'!

My Birth Story

It was 2 am - the last time I woke up for one of those 2 hourly urine sessions during my state of pregnancy. And then I went back to sleep.

It was 4 am - when I was dreaming that I was mopping my parents' house. It's a big single storey bungalow and I had just finished the front living room and was commencing on the back part of the house - the dining room.

But that was just a dream. Back to reality - I felt water gushing out of me. And it was strange because although I used to wake up 2 hourly to empty my bladder; I had NEVER wet the bed before. I knew something was off. I went to the toilet, sat on the commode and horror of horrors, there was blood. That really freaked me out cos from what I heard, there should not be blood if your water bag bursts. I was so very afraid that it was a miscarriage. Till this day I don't know how I would handle it if it was. I mean to carry your baby for 9 months and have a miscarriage? How can life possibly be normal ever again after that?

But I was calm. I knew God wouldn't do that to me. Not again after He had taken care of this baby so well through thick and thin. Oh yes, hurdles we certainly had a few. But with God's grace, overcome them all we did.

So I brushed my teeth and washed my face before waking up my husband saying, "Yang...I think it's time". To which hubby dearest in his groggy state of sleep replied, "Time for what?" :) =TIME FOR THE BABY=

That sure got him up and awake!

I waited for him to brush his teeth and wash his face and then we went to the dining room to have breakfast. Breakfast was Milo and 2 slices of bread. Then we calmly talked about when we should go to the hospital and decided to wait as it was only about 5 am and I wasn't in any pain. It was only then that I decided to wake my grandmother who in turn woke my mum who woke my dad up. Then hubby and I returned to the room, he decided to take a shower while I surfed the Internet looking for info on whether there is any blood if one's water bag bursts.

It was at 6 am that we decided to head for the hospital. Twas a lovely night with a full moon peeking out from amidst the clouds. And I was very calm, that much I remember.

When we got to the hospital, the usually bustling hospital was eerily silent and all the counters were closed. My husband and I made small talk as he wheeled me to the Emergency section in the hospital.

I was taken to the Maternity ward and upon checking, was told that I was already having contractions and my cervix was 5 cm dilated! It was amazing cos I did not know that I was having any contractions and to be 5 cm dilated without any pain....WOWZER!

Then hubby went to settle the admission and I was taken straight to LABOUR ROOM! ARRGH! Suddenly, everything was happening too fast, whirling out of control! Am I having the baby NOW???? But....but I'm not ready!!!

Thankfully, there was a god-sent nurse whose shift was ending but who was kind enough to console me by saying a prayer for baby and me. Best thing is she said I was COOL because God's work was already in me as I was hardly having any pain at 5 cm dilation! See? Even the nurse thinks I am one cool mama! :))

The good doctor came at about 8 ++ am to see me and decided to fully burst the water bag. It was then that the contractions ran havoc!!!!!! Unbearably HAVOC! He left and returned at about 10 am to begin the actual process of delivery. I was in so much pain that they gave me an injection which made me drowsy. BAD IDEA because I was so sleepy that I didn't/ couldn't push anymore. However, with strict prodding from a grumpy nurse and the doctor, push I did and baby Darla Anne Teh Dass was born at 10.39 am on 24 Sept 2010.

Birth weight: 2.7 kg (5.95 lbs)

Body length : 49 cm

Head circumference : 34 cm

Gynaecologist: Dr Jeevaretanam

Paediatrician: Dr Kannusamy

Hospital: Pantai Hospital, Klang

Mummy was warded on the 1st flr, bed A12

Thank you God for giving me the strength to be the vessel that brought your holy and anointed child into this world. Thank you God for giving me signs of your presence like the beautiful sunrise that I witnessed from the window in the labour room and for the presence of your angel; nurse Susan in my time of trial. Thank you God for my husband by my side, pressing me onward, holding my hand and empathising with me. Thank you God for the good and experienced team of nurses and doctors who were there to catch my baby as she made her grand entrance. Thank you God for family waiting outside of the labour room. Thank you for the labour process which was quick and painless in the first half. Most importantly, thank you God for my beautiful, precious little baby girl.

Baby's first few hours on Planet Earth.

My little angel is having her beauty sleep.


Remember to smile always Darla Anne!


We did it baby! We worked together and helped each other out! What a great team we make!

The Hopes And Fears Of All The Years; Are Met In Thee Tonight

According to the pregnancy ticker, it'll only be 5 weeks and 4 days til baby's arrival. According to my gynae, it'll be no more than 2 weeks time cos baby has to be delivered via c-section. I think this clash of theory is what keeps me awake at nights and in the wee hours of mornings because either way (i.e. normal or c-section), I am petrified!

Don't get me wrong. I mean, I can't wait to hold baby in my arms but normal delivery is definitely going to be painful. Caesarean - I've kinda done it before but who says it's not painful? Just the thought of operating knives cutting through your 7 layers of skin and then doctor reaching IN ME to bring baby out is like a flash from a horror show!

So, tell me. How exactly does one sleep peacefully in moments like these?

Yet at the same time, a baby is all my hubby and I have been yearning for over the last couple of years to close the void in our 'family' life. And we have been so ecstatic, so glad to be finally blessed with the chance of having our own little family throughout the whole pregnancy - except how does one remain optimistic when in fear? At times I feel like screaming bloody murder because as much as we both desired this pregnancy, why do I have to be the one who has to go through the excruciating terror and pain of childbirth? How is that fair in this so called 'equal' world? At times like these, it seemed that the feminist revolution was merely a big hogwash. End of the day, I believe there isn't such a thing as equal status among men and women. Honestly, give me some loving and pampering any time of the day, smoochie.

But I digress. I suppose these feelings are nothing new and I guess every new mom has felt it as she inches closer to her delivery date, no?

Baby, just so you know>>>Your mum ain't as tough as she always thought she was! Nevertheless my child, I pray that you receive the gifts of faith, hope and love. I wish for you that you are compassionate to the less fortunate, that you are warm, understanding, helpful, diplomatic. But above all, I pray that you carry in you huge quantities of humility and use this humility whenever you come in contact with humanity.

It will only be a matter of time before you join your daddy and me here and begin your lifelong education as a human being.

Eagerly awaiting your arrival,

Mom & Dad.